Hey guys, welcome to the start of the Vanuatu entries, it was an awesome holiday that evoked some epic writing. So let’s get cracking shall we?
A spotlight reveals an elegant leather bound book. It has gold leaf pages and the numbers ’2008’ emblazoned onto the cover. A force from no where opens the book and the pages flap over to ’Sunday 20th January week 3’ there is writing on the page. It is a person’s diary.

Dream: I was a fish

Woke up about two hours after I got to sleep, so...five. I was grumpy as. We did our final panics and packed our bags. Bonnie was sad to see us leave but Lou can take care of her. We crammed our massive bags into the tiny taxi and sped up to the airport. Ah the Driver, I liked him. He was just the right amount of stereotype and had a bald head, sparsely populated by tufts of spiky hair. I was tired, but very giddy to be in an airport. I love them. I did my whole ’funny’ thing and made all the people folk smile. We finally got to customs, when we got called back. We had been caught for having scissors. As the hairy guard searched through the bag, I saw all the weird stuff Mum packed, milk, noodles, a cushion. How odd, it was then I learnt that Tsara apparently became lactose intolerant and hadn’t told me : ( Left out...

Eventually we caught our plane (not after buying cool blue pillow things full of beans!!) It was so small. I could lye across it and be taller. So very cramped. Oh yeah, guess what I found out. It’s not ’Venuatu’ it’s ’Vanuatu’ Geez, thanks for telling me reader. I’ve been saying ’Venuatu’ like a dumbass As I sat in the economy seats of this box with wings, I suddenly became afraid of flying. All the normal thoughts "what if the engine falls off?" "What if we don’t take off and crash?" "What if, when we’re flying, a man dressed as Barny jumps up, latches onto the plane, fills it with AIDS and crashes us into a blimp shaped like a gorilla?" The usual stuff, you know. The flight was fine though. Mum wasn’t relaxing though. "I need you to sign here" I did so “Here’s your boarding pass, don’t lose it" I put it in the chair pocket "Greg, sign here" "Tsara, I need you to fill this out" Honestly, relax, you’re on holiday Mum. We flew over a big patch of green with about two little huts. We landed at a shack. Mum freaked out, we all did, but this was not our stop, no. we landed at an even crappier shack. I didn’t mind though, I even joked that all the people in the plane would be share housing with us "Who used the milk?" "...me" "Well enjoy your stomach ache"
Inside was the smallest airport ever , all of it was in a room about half the size of the school hall. The first thing I noticed when we stepped in was that wonderful bouncy ukulele music over a radio. I tried to see where it was. Several times, my eyes scooted over the entire band a foot away from e. lol They had a left handed guitarist, a right handed guitarist, a ukulele guy, a drummer, a singer a bass kind of thing like a bow. I liked the music they seemed to appreciate the applause. Mum turned to me and said "Ok, give me your boarding pass" That wiped the smile off my face. I said I put it in the chair pocket, I didn’t say I took it out again. My eyes widened and the band seemed to become silent. Everything in the world stopped except for Mum’s face slowly contorting into a scowl "..I think...I left it...on the plane" For a moment, Mum looked like she was going to strangle me, but my face was so full of fear and regret that she just tried to make me feel better. I was still worried though, a sign above said "Please present: 1 your boarding pass 2 your passport 3 A letter of authentication. The fact that we had Ray Charles as our guy made me laugh though. He looked just like him! He checked our passports one at a time, matching our pictures to our faces. He did me last and stared into my soul for a long while. He kept his eyes on me behind those dark glasses, smiled and let us through. -_-’’’
Needless to say, I needed a pee four hours before I went to ebd last night and far be it from me to do what body wants. So I had a good old pee. Lol I’m so high brow. We went through the minimalist customs where they take your word for it. Also, the band had followed us and set up shop right there and played away. After a little while, we went outside to a taxi ere they set up shop and played outside the airport. Cool. We were met with a friendly looking guy who led us to the most hostile looking person in the world. Not a happy bunny. He jammed our stuff into the boot and signalled us to get in. Then we took off. At first, it seemed nice, a bit uninhabited. A car drove past at a deadly pace and almost clipped the wing mirror. After a while, we came into town. lol Shady-vile. It was very slummy, run down shops, gangs, huge piles of rubbish. It was like Africa if it had a crappy little town. I saw Mum’s face. She was absolutely horrified. It didn’t help that this guy was the worst driver ever, although, judging on how all the others were driving, he could have been the best. Every time we’d speed past a car or blast past a pedestrian, Mum would make a fist on my knee. By the time we got there, I couldn’t feel my foot.

The guy drove us down the path to our apartment. She didn’t say anything, but Mum’s thoughts were clear "Oh...my...God...what have I done?" We were shown our place and Mum had to sit down. It was 17 steps from the back of the furthest room to the toilet down the hall. Mum went outside for a fag in a fit of manic disappointment. I quite like it actually. It was no five star resort, but it was a welcome change from the back room and my computer. Dad came back from outside and said he had just been to see the water. That’s when I remembered, this was a lagoon-side apartment. So I ran across the garden to see it. I stood on the ledge and stared into the muddy, grey water. A big brown leaf floated past; followed by lots more...looked cold. I went inside and slumped on the couch. I was starting to feel a little depressed. The island across the lagoon looked so nice with its turquoise water and golden sand.

I flicked on the T.V. There was channel 9, as in Brisbane’s channel 9 and something called star movies. ’Eragon’ came on. Oh I wanted to watch that. So when Mum and Dad said they were going shopping, it was at least 25% of me that wanted to watch that, everything else was "I’ll go to hell and back before I set foot in that town" so they left. The film was good, but it was dark, pitch black and they weren’t home yet. Me and Tsara exchanged worried looks. She’d give me worried looks and I’d exchange them for terrified. We did this dance for over an hour. It was highly plausible that Mum had been raped and Dad, trying to save her, had gotten his head bashed in with a lead pipe. At the pitchest of black, me and Tsara locked the house and took the long walk up the moonlit drive. We stood at the end of the road for a while. We had passed a shop on the way here in the taxi. Surely if we walked back the way it came, we’d find them, but we both agreed it’d be a bit reckless in a new country we’ve never been to. So we walked back, then for some reason, I turned around in time to see a bus pull up the opposite way that we were going to go and Mum and Dad stepped out with arms full f boxes. We helped them inside, then me and Tsara hugged Mum and Dad. lol babies. Now closer as a family, the girls went to bed and me and Dad watched the wonders of star movies. "The full Monty", "Kinky Boots", "Storm breaker" Awesomeness. This holiday... I’m probably going to miss it when I leave, but right now...

There you go, day one of the holiday. Interestingish lol. More to come stay tuned and comment away!